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After a long day of working, taking care of my kids and worrying about the state of the world, it’s easy for me to relax into one of my favorite activities: online shopping.
I may not be able to control how much groceries cost this week or stop a global conflict, but I can find some relief from a not-so-good habit. Hitting “purchase” on a new gym outfit or scented candle somehow calms my nervous system before bed. I get a little dopamine boost, feel more relaxed and, well, more in control.
I’m not the only one soothed by so-called “doom spending,” a term that’s popped up in recent years. It refers to making unnecessary purchases as a form of self-soothing in response to stress, often after doomscrolling.
“Spending is something we can control, even if it’s temporary. It’s a type of coping mechanism,” says Johnson Rhett, a certified financial planner (CFP) and financial advisor at Branning Wealth Management in Jackson, Mississippi.
But doom spending often leads to overspending and impulse purchases we later regret. Here are some ways to resist the pull.
1. Examine your habits
You might be a doom spender who doesn’t know it yet.
“Have you been mindlessly consuming content in your Instagram feed and then get an ad, and think, ‘that’s cute?’” asks Gabbi Cerezo, a CFP at Sustain Financial in Los Angeles.
Social media feeds are often targeted to our interests, and so are the ads. It’s easy to get sucked into purchasing items that feel like they were made for us, whether it’s a new wellness product or gadget.
Cerezo says that examining recent purchases might reveal that you’re spending more than you realized on things you don’t really need.
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2. Create a spending plan
“Reactive spending starts with a lack of structure,” says Trevor Gunter, a CFP and founder of Four Pines Financial in Atlanta. The answer is having a budget that accounts for all the various spending categories.
He wants clients to make purchases that are intentional and planned.
“I encourage people to know their monthly spending number, including a set amount for guilt-free spending,” he says. That allows you to enjoy your money while still keeping shopping in check.
Similarly, CFP Kevin Feig, founder of Walk You to Wealth in Massachusetts, recommends asking yourself why you’re making purchases and then evaluating if the reason makes sense.
“If you’re spending intentionally, it’s easier to stay on track financially without worrying about every spending category,” he says.
3. Find a balance
Allowing yourself a little “doom spending” isn’t necessarily a bad thing, says Patrick Yaghoobians, CFP and founder of Noor Financial Services in Los Angeles.
But you have to balance it, he says. If you have $200 in extra cash, consider spending $100 and putting the rest toward savings goals. After all, he says, we need to enjoy the moment at a time when bigger purchases — such as buying a home — may be out of reach.
That hybrid approach is a technique he uses himself. “If you have a clear system in place, there’s a boost in your confidence in terms of how you handle money,” he says.
4. Enforce some shopping guardrails
If you’re struggling to budget and find balance, then adding barriers to your online shopping clicks is a good next step. Deleting saved credit card information from sites, removing retail apps from your devices and logging out of online stores can help, Gunter says.
He started avoiding Instagram after he realized targeted ads had led to unplanned purchases. “I have unsubscribed to every promotional email I get, even from my favorite brands,” he adds. He also gives himself spending rules, such as only two new clothing item purchases per month.
Feig suggests putting on what he calls “financial blinders,” like a horse in a race. That means reducing news consumption, social media scrolling and other triggers that could lead to an unplanned purchase.
Cerezo recommends using your phone settings to set up time limit restrictions for social media and news apps. She also says to avoid scrolling at night — something she tries to do herself. “Generally, people have more willpower earlier in the day,” she says.
5. Look for alternatives
You can look to replace doom spending with cheaper activities that still provide a sense of relaxation. Rhett suggests going for a walk, calling a friend or finding a hobby. For him, that means more disc golf.
“Doing something you really enjoy outside of spending money can often alleviate stress,” he says.
As for my doom spending, being aware has made a big difference. Plus, I set a simple rule that’s working. I don’t let myself buy anything after 8 p.m. I can search for products and add them to my cart, but no buying. Then, I reevaluate my choices the next day.
That way, I have a better sense of whether I really want to spend the money or if I was just looking for a little comfort.
