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Money advice isn’t one-size-fits-all. How we navigate finances differs based on our backgrounds, priorities and family structures. For LGBTQ+ consumers, that can mean traditional money advice doesn’t always apply, says Nick Wolny, a personal finance columnist for Out magazine.
That’s why he wrote “Money Proud: The Queer Guide to Generate Wealth, Slay Debt, and Build Good Habits to Secure Your Future,” which is NerdWallet’s latest Book Club selection.
Wolny avoids messages like “avoid debt” or “stay below budget.” His approach to personal finance advice emphasizes self-expression and pursuing the life you want within reasonable, but not restrictive, bounds of financial responsibility.
That could mean taking out more student loans to find a welcoming community farther from home, or moving to an expensive city to find a bigger dating pool, he adds.
Here are five of Wolny’s top money tips.
1. Align spending with what makes you happy
If you constantly deny yourself purchases that you want, then it’s easy to burn out on budgeting, Wolny says.
That’s why he combines budgeting with journaling. “We’re going to go through the numbers but also look at why you spent that,” he says. Expenses that appear irrational on the surface might actually be deeply fulfilling, he adds.
For example, maybe you want to go to New York City three times a year because you love Broadway shows. That spending might seem excessive to some, but it makes perfect sense for you.
You can reduce expenses in other areas to fund those splurges, Wolny says.
“Spring is a great time for spring cleaning your subscriptions. It was a cold winter, and we subscribed to everything,” he says. Now, you can offload some of them.
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2. Rethink money rules
Instead of money rules like “Don’t do this,” or “You must do that,” Wolny recommends a more fluid approach. Maybe money advice you learned from your parents growing up, such as to never take on debt, can have exceptions.
For example, considering a loan for an educational program that will lead to your dream career might be a worthwhile risk.
“People have a lot of fixed mindsets and inherited beliefs around money that are shaping their financial lives,” Wolny says. He encourages people to question those long-held money beliefs if they’re no longer working.
3. Aim for flexibility in the job market
When Wolny was in his late 20s, he burned through his savings as he shifted to self-employment, and it took him a while to ramp up his earnings. While he considers that savings burn a money mistake, he says it taught him a valuable lesson about how to sell himself as an entrepreneur.
That’s one reason he encourages people to think entrepreneurially about their careers and be ready to adjust to the ever-changing job market.
“Your education is useful, but it might not be useful in the ways you originally thought,” he says. Being flexible, trying new things, being willing to change industries and investing in your skills are all useful strategies in today’s economy, he says.
4. Consider local laws and customs before moving
Wolny wants you to think about life after your career, too: where you’ll live and how you’ll spend.
Discrimination remains a challenge for LGBTQ+ people, so it’s a good idea to check on community and state laws and protections, especially as people get closer to retirement and consider moving.
Spousal benefits, Social Security benefits and discrimination protections are all worth investigating, Wolny says.
5. Make an estate plan
You have to think about succession as well.
“Many people avoid estate planning because it requires thinking about death,” Wolny says.
Instead, he encourages people to embrace the task because it helps you reflect on your legacy and who you want to be in life.
Wolny encourages LGBTQ+ consumers to create an estate plan, including paperwork like a will. Creating a health care directive and power of attorney document can also make it easier for a partner to help you if you are incapacitated.
“Many people don’t realize the hierarchy of bloodline relatives in estates when there is no estate paperwork,” Wolny says.
So what do all of these tips have in common, and what does it mean to be money proud?
Wolny’s advice is to spend time thinking about the things that matter to you, especially when it comes to money.
How to enter NerdWallet’s Book Club giveaway
NerdWallet is giving away a copy of the book. Learn more about how to enter.
